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Puer
Puer Puer
 

Puer


A Chinese tea fermented twice and left to mature underground, with a strong, earthy flavour 

Quantity: 100g bag 

Punning Bee, Punning Bee, tell me about your favourite tea.

“Well, Lee Rosy, I’ve been drinking a lot of Puer recently. It certainly keeps me buzzing – thanks – which is good because those flowers won’t pollinate themselves, you know. The big attraction for me as a Punning Bee is that this tea tastes a lot like it sounds. Some people take a sip and exclaim “Pooer!” and I think, “Great”.

"Puer has a strong, earthy, pungent flavour – too pungent for some, that’s right, but other people like it so much they drink nothing else. The taste comes from its unique production method – this Puer is fermented twice and buried underground for at least a year – to decompose for a while, basically. The longer the time underground, the finer the quality.

“In recent years there has been something of a fad for Puer to be promoted as miracle weight-loss tea, with a slew of celebrity endorsements. This claim is also made for a number of other teas such as white tea, oolong and green teas – although these teas should not be confused with other drinks on the market, the so-called 'Slimmers’ Teas' which contain nasty ingredients that facilitate weight loss – by making you vomit repeatedly."

Yes, I did experiment with some of those in moments of weakness. 

“And how did it work out?”

I lost 5 pounds. Mostly stomach lining.

“The problem is, the public is always looking for the next magic cure, whether it’s cancer, ageing or weight loss, which explains – for example – the incessant headline stories of the Daily Express, which are designed purely to bestow upon their aged readership the dream of eternal life. Various types of tea often make convenient candidates whenever a modestly promising study is published. There may be a number of beneficial effects of teas that are not yet fully understood – but the coverage is usually exaggerated, so pardon me if I’m not so infuse-iastic."

Oof.

"Now if you ask me, you should drink your tea firstly because of its great flavour and secondly because most teas have lots of chemicals such as anti-oxidants that seem to promote good health in general. If you like strong and rich, unabashed flavours, as I do, then you’ll love Puer. A pungent tea for a Pun Gent like me.”

Punning Bee, that was shocking.

“I can’t help it. I’m a Punning Bee. Other bees make honey. Punning Bees make Funny. And Punny things.”

Stop it! Stop it! One more like that and it’s a swish of the Daily Express for you. Just tell me, does Puer make the fat fly off or not?

“Well there is some evidence that certain types of tea such as Puer, green tea and oolong can speed up the metabolism very modestly, which might help slightly but only as part of an overall weight loss programme. Unfortunately, there’s only one type of tea that burns a lot of fat. It’s called physical activi-tea.” 

(SPLAT)




Price: £3.80


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